One of my greatest pleasures has always been walking on the beach at Agonda, with music and drinks.
Whenever I went there, I would have a late, heavy, protein-rich breakfast—three eggs and toast. Then I would make three large, stiff vodkas, mix them with cold water, put them in a bottle, take my music, and set off. I mostly listen to English pop music from the 80s, Madonna, Elton John, Phil Collins, Eric Clapton etc.
I always stay on the southern side of Agonda and walk towards the northern end. At the north end of the beach, a lovely stream merges into the sea. Just before the stream there are a few quaint little beach shacks. One of my favourites is called the Hidden Garden Restaurant. It has an open seating area on the first floor.
It would take me about forty-five minutes to walk there. The entire beach is roughly four kilometres long. I would reach the restaurant, have another drink, and eat something—perhaps noodles and soup. By the time I left, around one or one-thirty in the afternoon, I would usually be quite drunk.
Then I would go into the river and swim.
That was, of course, pretty dangerous. But I used to do a lot of dangerous things when I was drunk.
Anyway, I loved it. Absolutely loved it.
I had been doing this for about twenty years, since 2005. I would go to Agonda two or three times every season, between October and April.
The last time I went was on March 27, 2026.
This time I also had my new Meta smart glasses. I reached Agonda in the morning and had my breakfast. Then I thought, for a change, I would use the glasses for music instead of carrying my headphones.
And, also for a change, I didn't drink.
Instead of walking north, I went south. I walked along the beach listening to music through the glasses, and I loved it.
Then something occurred to me.
Perhaps it wasn't the drink that I loved most.
Perhaps it was the music.
And if music was what I really loved, why did I need the drinks at all? I could simply listen to music and get rid of the alcohol. That would certainly be better for me.
So I didn't drink. I walked to the southern end of the beach, found a lovely place, had a good swim, came back, and took a nap.
Then evening came.
And the craving struck.
I ran down to the liquor store, bought a nice bottle of vodka, and started drinking again.
So there you go. Back to square one.
That night, at 11:55, I had the last drink. I still remember that little glass of vodka. I had gone out for dinner, came back, finished the drink, and went to sleep.
The next morning I felt pathetic.
I thought: Why? Why did I have to do it? What exactly did I gain by drinking?
Nothing much.
It was just addiction. There was really nothing in it.
So that morning I decided to give it another try.
Once again, I put on my glasses and went walking. Once again, I loved it.
I didn't need to drink.
That evening I went to the southern side again. There is a cliff there from which you can watch the sunset. I deliberately stayed until quite late, until it was dark.
I knew that if I went back to the hotel too early, I might start drinking again.
So instead of going back, I stopped at a beach shack and sat down for dinner.
I ordered a fruit punch with a scoop of vanilla ice cream and some tandoori prawns.
I loved that dinner.
For perhaps the first time in my life, I really enjoyed a dinner in Goa because I could actually taste it. I wasn't completely drunk.
I came back to the hotel, had one more ice cream, didn't drink, and went to sleep.
The next morning I felt great.
And I thought: Okay. I will not drink.
I sealed up the vodka bottle.
I stayed in Agonda for another couple of days, and I didn't drink. Then I came back home.
And I haven't had a drink since.
This Sunday will be exactly six months since that last little glass of vodka.
Six sober months.
Not a single drink.
And I am really enjoying it.
I sleep better. I have much more time. I get to do so many more things.
And perhaps the most surprising thing is that I discovered something very simple on that beach in Agonda.
For years I thought I loved walking on the beach with music and vodka.
It turned out I really loved walking on the beach with music.
The vodka was never the best part.
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